It was just a short 5 hours roundtrip from Seria to BSB and my colleague's handphone had been beeping non-stop interrupting our conversations every 15 minutes. He picked his phone up and took a glance at the screen and put it down sighing...
"I never know this dating business can be so boring.. I'm so going to give it up soon."
"Huh? Why? Is that your girlfriend who's texting you all this while?"
"Urm... not really a girlfriend la..."
"Just tell me how long have you guys been seeing each other then."
"1... 2.... 3... 4.... Urm, 4 weeks?"
"WHAT! 4 weeks only and she's behaving like that already?"
"Ya lah.. that's the thing. We're only in the "dating stage" and she's already scaring me off!"
"Then.. You just leave it like that? Ignoring saja?"
"I already told her save her credits and stop calling and texting me when its unneccessary but she'll call or text in middle of the night telling me that she's sad or crying now and demanded me to go to her house right away! Gila kan?"
This is not just an ordinary attention seeker we talking about, but way scarier than that.
UHU glue is a much appropriate name I guess.
Sometimes I really wonder how can some people be so clingy to their other halves. I heard stories of couples living together and yet when the girl's friend invited her to any gathering or party, she'll have to ask the boyfriend first and make sure he's fine with it then baru can leave the house. And if she has to go out, the boyfriend has to follow.
What are you girl? His pet in the cage?
I mean, come on.
The word "sweet" never come across my mind seeing my girl-friends picking up phone calls and answering to their boyfriends, report to them their goings and doings and then their boyfriends set curfews up demanding them to be at home by what time. A better alternative word that I would use will be, "Suffocation".
I have a friend who will received calls from the boyfriend every time he wakes up in the morning, leaving home for work, lunching out, reaching home after work, meeting friends to lim-teh and the girl has to repeat the cycle everyday likewise. And if he called and my friend didn't get to pick up the phone on time and he had to call for the second or third time, habis tia. Sure marah and demand a valid reason.
So even doing "business" in the toilet or washing car in the garage also have to report / acknowledge first kah?
I got confused and asked, "Not tired kan like that?" and she said she's used to it because that's how they were years ago when they just started their relationship. Still she did feel exhausted at times but if that's how their relation works, she'll just do it.
As for me, the first and foremost "condition" that I have for a relationship is being happy and content. If having a boyfriend means that most of the time have to be taken away by him leaving no space for me myself, feeling tensed and worried every time I go out with my friends.. I rather give it up and be single.
I remember being really mean to Bobby when we just started to date, telling him..
"I tell you ah, I may inform you if I'm going out with my friends. But keep in mind that I'm not asking for your permission ya. Please don't try to stop me from doing things and keep me in control because I don't like..."
Feels like I'm a big bad wolf bullying a harmless little sheep.
Bobby and I are a pair of odd couple, according to some. We're not very clingy to each other because, we rarely talk on the phone since you know.. I hate talking over the phone and at normal days, we only exchange like 2 - 3 SMS per day. Sometimes during those peak period, we might even just conked out and slept like a dead log without a good night message.
So sometimes I also don't understand why some people can non-stop texting with their boy/girlfriends. Got so much of things to talk kan? Mind you, if you ever eavesdrop mushy couples conversation, it's really lame and crappy like:
- Baby have you eaten?
- Yes darling. You leh?
- Already also... how many bowls of rice baby ate?
- 1 bowl lor.
- Har? 1 bowl only ah? Not enough baby. Must eat many many become strong strong protect me.
- Like that baby go eat more rice now ah. Eat till big big protect my darling.
- BABY WHY NO LAYAN ME?!
- Huh? What? I'm eating rice, you told me so...
- YOU CHOOSE RICE OVER ME! HOW COULD YOU!
- I love you baby.
- I love love you darling.
- I love love love you baby.
- I love love love love you!
- I love love love love love you more!
- I love x 100 you!
- Then I love x 1000000 !
- Fine! I love x Infinity! I WIN!
Hahhahahaaa. So stupid.
Nevermind me, I'm just amusing myself.
Of course, if you feel happy that your partner is so emotionally attached to you, needing you every minute and second, congratulations.. You guys are made for each other.
But if the person you're dating now appears to be a psychotic stalker.... all I can say is,
I think needy people are suffering from insecurities. I have to admit that I have that moment too once in a while, being all cranky and demand for more attention from the fatguy but my superego will give me warning about it, reminding me myself that being too clingy could destroy a relationship. But.. I still think I score pretty high for being a girlfriend since the boyfriend only complained not having enough time with me (only average 5 hours a week) and requesting me to be mean to other people and not him. Hahhahahahaaa. Okay, come to think of it... I think I only score border line pass being a girlfriend.
Emotionally clingy and lack of self-esteem can be pretty much the same thing actually. I often think that people who can't function independently very kasian. They can't maintain separateness and basically is living like a parasite feeding on other people's words and opinions. I think people with attachment disorder should their own interests and hobbies first, divert some attention from their partners.
Just take a step backward and enjoy the fresh air and get a better view of the world.
Okie, now get back to work Nonnie!
You still have 5 - 700 words more to go for your psycho essay!