Thursday, April 9, 2009

Age, Marriage and Child


Having tons of friends who got married last year only lead to a brand new season of drama to follow up, and this time, the title is “Pregnancy”.

Some of them were just married 3, 4 months ago and they’d been bombarded with questions like … “Belum berisi?”

Honestly, I don’t quite understand why some people loves rushing others into the “next stage” when it’s not quite…. you know… their business.

So what if your so-and-so is so damn fertile and gets pregnant few months after their wedding. Does it really matter?

In my opinion, what matters most is the upbringing of the child. No?

So what if I get married when I’m just 23, then become a mother at the age of 24, and later my child turns out to be a hooligan / unemployed parasite who always ask money from me when I’m 60 years old? Is that what you still label it as an “achievement”?

My mum got married at the age of 28 and gave birth to me when she’s 30.. which is considered pretty old in the 70s. I remember when I was young, some annoying aunties actually teased her and showed-off that their kids were already in the secondary when I was still in primary.

…… what the heck.

And look what happens now.
The so-called “achievements” of those aunties turned out to be.. less worthy to brag now.

You see what I mean?

Really kasian you know when I heard my friends telling me how her “relatives” pressured and made sarcastic remarks on her still-flat-no-bump-tummy. Haiyah, all that these kaypo (busybody) people want is to have another topic/story to gossip only.

Kasian lah the victims. Bo-tai-bo-chi kana said.

Thank God so far *touchwood* none of our parents are rushing us to get married. Honestly, if possible.. a big IF lah, I would like to have a baby first. Hehehehe. But of course, this is totally unacceptable in this conservative place and it’s super wrong and sinful to most people. I mean, if I wanna get married now, one big reason behind it is because.. I wanna be a mummy before 30, while my “engine” still boleh pakai. 


Okay okay, I get it mum.

For now, I’m 25… coming 26… and happily enjoying my single-life.
Wedding and baby, can still wait lah… I think? 
Say want then got meh? You think make kuih ah?
This kind of thing cannot rush one mah.

Don’t “Emperor not in a hurry, eunuch panic”.


Carol said...

Aiyah Nonnie, sometimes the questions just come out automatically or maybe because, no other more interesting questions..

But whatever you said is true.

Hungryduo said...

don't think too much. i often get questions like when am i getting engaged or kahwin with my bf too.
i just smile smile saja haha

- Hunnie <3

Nonnie King said...

Carol : True.. I think people asks those question to pass time only.

Hunnie : wah lao.. but you still very young leh!

Hungryduo said...

yea loh, cause we have been together for many years and other people think it's time to engage hehe

- Hunnie <3

kelly said...

As if u get that question a lot compared to my "30++" (exact age not to be exposed) yrs old bf ho??? hahahah....anyway, this is going to be my usual answer if anyone going to ask again bcoz coincidentally despite your blog title, my colleague just ask me the same question today =/ I just told him 1-2 yrs later and he really believes it! =_____='''watever la.....
AND HO..You don simply say say, later 4D also not that "chun" & the next thing I saw is "a-slight-plump-balloon-tummy"! LOL

Tasha said...

Well.. One thing for sure being married is hard work!! Sure it is nice n everything but why the rush?? Honestly, the longer you've been in relationship with a guy, i think you have far far more happy marriage.

I've been married for almost 6 years and its rather annoying that everyone kept asking me why don't i want a baby? esp. in asian culture. How can I have a kid if life already hard itself.. to feed me and my husband.. People think that something is wrong with you if you don't have kids.. it's called being responsible! I don't want to have kids and work 9-5 to support them.. I want to be stay at home mom.

In asia, you can pass your baby to your family.. easily.. some live with their parents but it doesn't mean that I should just simply have baby.

I so get your point... it's really annoying.. why can't people just understand that I would like to go vacation, purchase an expensive purse... when I have baby.. it's all over. :)But don't get me wrong I would LOVE to have kids one day when I know I can be responsible.. OR God forbid... my Birth control fail ha ha ha ha

Wherever you go, this kind of question will arise so just nod your head and smile. It's your life.. not theirs!

CiliQueen said...

Hi Nonnie...

I agree with Tasha's your life not theirs. Who cares if you have lots of problems b4 or after marriage and having kids? Their only problem is too humiliate you with all those questions ...I have been asked many times when is the second baby coming and so are the list of questions...and my answer is that i am not planting chillies ..lols

All matters is that you and bf or hubby are happy and lead the life you wanted ...

p/s: if you get married, don't 4get to invite CQ ahhh heheee ...

cheers ..